Authenticity and Joy

I stopped hustling to "get my shit together" and finally remembered my spark.

Anyone else feeling a little out of sorts at the start of this year?

It’s okay. So am I.

I needed this reminder today and figured you might too: You’re allowed to slow down. You’re allowed to go at your own pace.

We’re still in winter—a season of introspection and recalibration. Slowing down isn’t weakness; it’s wisdom. And honestly, what I’ve learned so far this year is that the strongest thing I can do is to honor that.

It's okay if 2025 hasn't started the way you thought it would. It certainly hasn’t for me or for many others in my LA community. The world is changing—almost too quickly to grasp—and I’ve had to take more time, like a lot more time, than I expected at the beginning of this year to ground, reset, and recalibrate. I’ve spent this month looking at what I want my life to feel like, knowing that the vision is always evolving.

What I’ve come to realize—or rather, what I’ve remembered recently—is that play, joy, and the things that light you up aren’t just indulgence; they’re essential. In fact, they’re just as important, if not more so, than going to bed early, taking your supplements, and checking every “should” off your to-do list.

That unbridled, bursting-at-the-seams joy—that is where the magic lives.

I was reminded of this over the weekend at two friends’ joint birthday party. The theme was Indian, a celebration of their heritage, and as part of the festivities, the guests were split into groups and given 30 minutes to choreograph and rehearse an original Bollywood-style music video. To be honest, I arrived at the party completely exhausted and defeated after the past few weeks (LA fires, searching for a new home, and trying to settle into work life). I didn’t have much energy in me to socialize.

And yet, the moment we started dancing, something came alive within me. A spark—my joy. Collaboration, play, movement, and music all helped me access a part of myself that I had abandoned this month in the constant hustle to “try and get my shit together.”

Recently, I’ve had so many conversations with healers, teachers, and friends about this. One recurring theme that has stood out: You’ll never be able to think your way or plan your way to freedom and joy. If you’re constantly chasing after it, you’ll miss the very moments that bring it to life.

The followers, the money, the perfectly crossed-off to-do list—all of that can feel great, but if your happiness is contingent on those outcomes, you’re never truly “there.” You’ll always be moving toward some elusive future. And that’s where I was getting stuck.

So, instead of forcing myself to push through this cycle of feeling rushed and “lazy” and inadequate, I’ve been leaning into the things that spark my joy and bring me back to the present moment. Getting out in nature. Taking deep, intentional breaths. Dancing. Lifting weights. Practicing yoga. Playing, laughing, and being in community. These things feel inherent to who I am, and when I start there—in that state of being—everything else follows. The to-do list gets done. The work flows more naturally. Life feels more aligned. And I drop back into the rhythm that this year is offering me rather than trying to fight against the current.

And lately, I’ve been prioritizing these moments over the to-do list I thought I needed to tackle by the end of January 2025, and honestly, it’s been exactly what I’ve needed. These moments have been essential in helping me heal and process what has been a very challenging first month of the year.

This ties into something that has deeply resonated with me recently and a fact I learned from a great article linked here: the idea that authenticity is the highest frequency, even above love. That’s because authenticity is love. When we’re truly ourselves—not chasing outcomes, not performing, but simply being—we’re embodying the purest form of love there is.

I’ve always found that my most successful, meaningful moments happen when I’m rooted in play, community, laughter, and joy—not when I’m obsessing over how to make it all work or trying to strategize my way to success. When I’m in that state of authenticity, everything I desire flows more freely. Not because I’m chasing it, but because I’m embodying the frequency of it.

Many people believe, “When I have [insert goal here], I’ll be happy.” But they’re chasing something external, and in doing so, they’re tying their joy to an outcome. True happiness doesn’t come from achieving or having; it comes from being in the energy you seek. If you want joy, be joyful. If you want connection, embody connection.

As Belinda Matwali beautifully writes in her piece on authenticity, “The work is in the being, and the doing comes after.” Authenticity isn’t just a state; it’s a practice. It’s about letting go of the need to seek and instead sinking into the truth of who you already are. That’s where freedom, joy, and love truly live.

So, as this month comes to a close, I’m holding onto that lesson. I’m letting joy lead. I’m prioritizing the moments that light me up, trusting that everything else will follow when I’m rooted in that energy. I hope this resonates with you, wherever you are in your journey. Let’s keep reminding each other that the magic isn’t in the outcome—it’s in the being, the playing, the laughing, and the connecting.

Here’s to a year of authenticity, joy, and unapologetic play.